Thursday, October 8, 2009

Britney's Birthday Wish List

Another beautiful birthday is just around the corner for Britney. It'll be a day to celebrate life, those in it, and the food that makes it bearable. But what would best mark the end of a wondrous year and welcome the start of 365 days of unpredictability? A wish list. I know, random, right? But this is a different wish list--one that requires looking forward, not back. Besides--it's my birthday--and I can wish if I want to.

Wish #1 - A little boy with Adam's eyes, ears, and everything--who would be legally our's (no street stealing).
Wish #2 - An overnight nursing degree.
Wish #3 - A black, four-door Merecedes Benz (don't ask me the model, I have no idea)
Wish #4 - These:

Girls, get yourselves a pair(s) of platform ankle boots/rocker heals. They will make you happy. They also come in a variety of styles--making them ageless = Moms, get a pair.
Wish #5 - A check in the mail for $100 million, and also a letter from our bank telling us we don't have to pay back our school loans.
Wish #6 - Have Rachel Zoe style me and, because I look so awesome, pay me to wear designer clothes and come in for weekly styling/fittings.
Wish #7 - Own a private jet with free gas and maintenance that takes me all across the world to my millions of private runways, including the front doors of delicious restaurants.
Wish #8 - A big custom made home with spiraling marble stair cases and LG red washer and dryer.
Wish #9 - A complete white wash of the government. We need new people to corrupt it.
Wish #10 - A plastic card that is honorable world wide for free stuff.
Wish #11 - A personal masseuse.
Wish #12 - A mountain full of gold to pay back our debts to China so everyone would stop freaking out.
Wish #13 - A brand new house for my parents.
Wish #14 - Adam to design a world-wide logo (same as Coca Cola, Nike, etc.) so he can instantly peak in his career and be recognized globally as awesome.
Wish #15 - Finding the cure for cancer.
Wish #16 - A button that makes everyone instantly successful.
Wish #17 - Another button that instantly changes my outfit.
Wish #18 - One more button that makes me instantly ready for bed.
Wish #19 - The ability to fly via sheer awesomeness.
Wish #20 - A digital map that shows the exact locations and intents of every bad person in the world.
Wish # Above everything - Exaltation with my husband and family.
DONE.
Friends and Family:
Make it happen.
Psht. Just kidding.


7 comments:

meghan elizabeth said...

Maybe you will have accomplished wish one and two by the time I get back! Actually not maybe, you probably will.

Samantha said...

Um, I can't really afford any of these so how about... brownies?

brett and alyssa said...

this is the most perfect wish list, nothing wrong with getting any of these!! and i love rachel zoe!!! i need options......

Lisa said...

those red lg washer and dryers are plain hot. i want 'em too.

Ailinh Harris said...

i would love to buy those rocker heel/ankle boots thangs for you, but i dont know if we can afford it. Do ugg boots work instead??

amber lee said...

happy almost birthday britney! only 6 more days until all of these wish list items come true!!! :)

manders said...

Uh are you trying to say something about your wish #1???? Those are great wishes and about 2 will come true right!!! j/k.